ID proponent: Wow, these bacterial flagella sure are complex!
Biologist: Hey they sure are, isn’t that neat! I wonder if we can work out how they got that – hey where are you going?
ID proponent: To write a paper showing how flagella support my thesis for intelligent design!
Biologist: But why? Shouldn’t we study this further and try to understand the–
ID proponent: It’s too complex! It clearly can’t have evolved. Finally I have proof for my religious bel… I mean my completely naturalistic proposition that life is too complex to have simply evolved without intervention.
Biologist: But since there’s so much evidence in support of evolution, maybe we should look a little harder?
ID proponent: lalalalala!
Biologist: But surely you understand that the first step in testing any hypothesis is to try to prove it wrong? We have an obligation to investigate further!
ID proponent: Oh alright, if you insist…
– The following day –
ID proponent: Well, I’m stumped. The only explanation is that Go… I mean some organizing intelligence… designed this little wiggly thing. I mean, come on, it’s so effective and clever a design– and a design needs a designer right?
Biologist: Honestly, I’m starting to suspect that you’re not trying very hard here. You can’t seriously be planning to use your inability to explain something as proof of such a proposition?
ID proponent: Ok wise guy, tell me how it evolved then?
Biologist: Well I don’t know, we need to investigate further before simply assuming it’s impossible…
ID proponent: Oh, nice. So you get to assume that this feature evolved, but I don’t get to assume that it didn’t. You’re an atheist aren’t you!
Biologist: What does that have to do with anything? And I just want to explore how it might have evolved.
ID proponent: Ha! As an atheist you have an ideological predisposition to ignore evidence of a creator! You’re biased!
Biologist: What evidence of a creator?
ID proponent: It’s right in front of you on that slide! Flagella man, flagella! What are you thick or something?
Biologist: Sorry… how exactly is this evidence for a creator?
ID proponent: Well if you found a watch wouldn’t you consider that proof that there was a watchmaker?
Biologist: Sure.
ID proponent: Because watches don’t make themselves right? They are a complex machine of many working parts, one isn’t just going to fall together.
Biologist: Sure.
ID proponent: So someone designed this bacterium! It’s obvious! It didn’t just fall together either!
Biologist: Well, a bacterium made this bacterium, which was in turn made by another bacterium… I’m pretty sure you know this. And watches don’t reproduce, so we know that some other entity must have created it. I honestly fail to see the equivalence here.
ID proponent: Honestly you just hate God don’t you. Admit it!
Biologist: Look, all living organisms have an ancestry, and we can observe bacteria evolve even in the lab, so I really can’t see why on earth you wouldn’t want to try to explore the evolutionary path of this mechanism. At least to its most primitive form? I mean, even if there was some original bacterium designed by a supreme being or alien race or something….
ID proponent: Hmmmph! Aliens! Yeah right!
Biologist:… I’m saying even if it was designed… this sample is still going to be a descendant millions of generations removed from the original isn’t it? So there’s still an incentive to trace the lineage back as far as we can go.
ID proponent: Only if you believe in evolution.
Biologist: Wait… what? Are you saying you don’t believe in evolution? At all?
ID proponent: Only micro evolution, not macro. Animals evolve only within species, that’s why cats can never turn into dogs.
Biologist: What the… What the hell are you even talking about? This bacterium reproduces asexually… there is no delineation of species here.
ID proponent: Why are you atheists so angry all the time?
Biologist: You are so fucking fired…
ID proponent: Oooo this is just like Nazi Germany… I’m going to tell Ben Stein!