Int. fish bowl - day
Two goldfish, KEN and DEIDRE, bob about aimlessly.
Deidre
You know, just these last few seconds I've had the strangest feeling that I've forgotten everything I've ever known.
Ken
Really!!! I feel exactly the same!
(appreciative pause)
... Like just now, I've completely forgotten what your name is!
Deidre
It's Deidre.
Ken
Mine's Ken
Deidre
Your what is Ken?
Ken
Er... My name is Ken.
Deidre
Oh I see... My name is Deidre.
Ken
You know Deidre, I find you very fascinating.
Deidre
It's very nice of you to say
Ken
Say what?
Deidre
That you find me fascinating...
Ken
Did I say that? God I hate being a goldfish! I can't seem to remember anything for more than five seconds!
Deidre
I know, it's just awful isn't it.
Ken
I was talking to someone just a little while ago about this problem. I've forgotten her name now.
Deidre
I'm very sorry but now I've forgotten your name...
Ken
It's Ken... And yours???
Deidre
And my what???
Ken
Your name?
Deidre
Deidre.
Ken
Oh Yes of course... God I hate being a goldfish! I can't seem to remember anything for more than five seconds!
Deidre
I have an idea... Why don't we introduce ourselves each time we speak. That way we wont have to waste time asking for each others names.
Ken
That sounds like a good idea. You start.
Deidre
OK... Hi I'm Deidre!... We have to remember to keep doing it. This might be our opportunity to actually retain some knowledge.
Ken
OK... Hi, I'm Ken!... You know Deidre, I find you very fascinating.
Deidre
Hi, I'm Deidre! Thank you Ken, it's very nice of you to say that.
Ken
Hi, I'm Ken! Say what?
Deidre
Hi, I'm Deidre! That you find me fascinating...
Ken
Did I say that? God I hate being a goldfish! I can't seem to remember anything for more than five seconds! And why do you keep introducing yourself?
Deidre
What do you mean? You're the one who keeps introducing himself, I'm just trying to be polite.
Ken
(annoyance turns to revelation)
Wait a minute... I think I know why we were introducing ourselves!!!... it was so that we wouldn't keep forgetting each other... But we still forgot whatever it was we were talking about. We'll have to keep reminding each other of the conversation as well. Why don't we try saying our name, followed by a summary of whatever it is we are talking about. Quick, you start before I forget.
Deidre
Ummm, Ok... Deidre, err.... talking about trying not to forget by saying our names and summarising conversation... err... your turn
Ken
(completely confused)
What??? Oh now just a minute! I see what your saying! Your reminding me of our conversation so it can be continued! And Deidre is your name! Brilliant idea! OK, here I go...
Ken.... err.... talking about trying not to forget by saying our names and summarising the conversation... your turn.
Deidre
(looking around to see the Ken that Ken is addressing)
What are you talking about? Who's Ken? And what is it that he's trying not to forget?
Ken
Well, you're Ken aren't you? That's what I just called you.
Deidre
Then I suppose I must be. What's your name?
Ken
Urmmm... Actually you know, I think it's Ken... as well???
Deidre
Well that makes it awkward doesn't it... two Kens in the one fish bowl.
Ken
Yes I suppose it does. Why don't I change my name... to Deidre.
Deidre
Why do you need a new name?
Ken
Because I can't remember the old one.
Deidre
You know, just these last few seconds I've had the strangest feeling that I have forgotten everything that I've ever known.